Saturday, March 9, 2013

Eggs are good for your hair...or are they?

Tried to use eggs in my hair!

To make it:
Fuller!
Smoother!
Stronger!

Mixed it up with mayonnaise to make it:
More Fuller!
More Smoother!
More Stronger!

Stuck my head wrapped in eggs and mayonnaise under the heat lamp to make it:
Most Fullest!
Most Smoothest!
Most Strongest!

Burned all my hair out because I cooked my head full of mayonnaise and eggs
And now I smell like a toasty sandwich and look bald!

Don't want to hear people telling me I smell like a toasty sandwich and AM bald.
Especially the people I mayonnaised my head for in the first place.
I wanted to have fuller, smoother, stronger hair for you because you like to talk about all your fullest, smoothest, strongest hair.
I don't want to hear how my hair was fuller, smoother and stronger before I baked my mayonnaise head under the heat lamp hat.

Why did you turn the heat up so damn high anyway??
Couldn't you smell the eggs burning??